life*
“who you are is never who you thought you would be”
Over the past few years I have wandered through ups and downs like everyone else, but what always seems to strike me the most is how through it all, it is myself who evolves to fit the needs of my surroundings.
The past few years have been a bit of a roller coaster, but in a good way. I have been married to a lovely lady for the past 2 years. In the first year of marriage we were able to also purchase a sweet condo on the American River, and then in our second year of started a new business. People say the first couple years of marriage are the hardest, and let me just say that throwing a large purchase and a new “life” (owning a business) into the mix and things have been wild. All that to say things are going exceptionally well and Sara and I are doing great, but had you asked me three years ago if this is where I wouldbe… the answer would have been definitively, “No Way”
My point in all this…
We strive for years to become the man or woman we have built in our head, but in the end there are so many outside influences that reroute our road to life that endless beliefs of who you are is forever fleeting. Recognize who you would like to become and be aware of your surroundings that guide you along the way, then you can marry the two into an elegant mixture that is, YOU.
“I am not the man I envisioned, but I know who I strive to become.“
Wow, I couldn’t have read this at any better time. I totally understand where you are coming from and completely agree. This is something I have been struggling with for at least a year or two now. Six months ago, my husband and I were living in a small town in northern Mississippi. Him teaching at a terrible-governed school and me managing a book store for a company that could care less about anything but money. We were lost & confused and struggling to find ourselves. That’s where California came in to play! We left everything we knew back behind us and headed towards Sacramento. Long story short — a move was not the only thing we needed. We were still lost and that confusion left us unhappy which eventually led to a separation. During said separation we had the opportunity to dig down deep and found out who we were as individuals. THAT is so important — taking time to reflect and to realize what WE want for ourselves. We often get swept away in life and OTHER people’s lives to focus on what is most important and that is our well-being and aspirations.
I’m happy to say that is what my husband and I have done and are STILL doing. But now we are doing it together.
“Recognize who you would like to become and be aware of your surroundings that guide you along the way, then you can marry the two into an elegant mixture that is, YOU.” I love that. For the past months I was so confused… all I wanted was to better my life but everything was falling apart. Needless did I know at the time it was all happening for a reason… My husband and I are now back together — our marriage couldn’t be any better. We are happy & on the right path to living very fulfilling lives because we finally are aware of WHO WE ARE and what we want. 
Great post! I’m sorry for sharing my entire life story, hah. Just wanted to share and let you know I completely agree. Congratulations on your marriage by the way! Keep it strong.